I'm going to start at the beginning. I want to talk about my third and final birth story. It was such a different experience than the first two that I want to write it down while it's still somewhat fresh in my mind so I don't forget too much.
We checked into the hospital at 10 am on Monday August 29, 2011. It was Sam, my mom, my little sister and me. They got me to my room right away. I was still pretty calm. The nurses started going over all paper work with me and they started my IV. Then my doula came in and my older sister too. We were all just laughing and talking...my doula also gave me a foot massage. At about 11:45 the nurse anesthetist came in to talk to me about pain control. I talked to her about my experience with morphine in the past and how I didn't like the way it made me feel. She was soooo nice and said that normally they put morphine in the spinal when they give the spinal but she didn't have to do that if I didn't want to. I didn't. Also we talked about pain management after the surgery and I explained to her how sensitive I am to medicines so I didn't need the full dose of morphine they usually give. So she instead ordered a half dose for my pain pump of only 1 mg. This conversation made me feel soooo much better about everything. I felt like, although I didn't have 100% control of what was going to happen I at least had some input on things. Something that I did not feel before when I gave birth to Collin & Gwen. I know that they have me morphine in my spinal with Gwen without consulting me and I'm pretty sure they gave me versed as well. :-(
At around 12:05 they said they were ready for me to walk down to the OR. I started getting nervous at this point but not too bad yet. Sam, my doula Trish and I started down the hallway. I said my goodbye to Sam since he couldn't go in the OR when my spinal was placed. Trish could though which I was soo thankful for.
When I walked into OR it was so cold and the bed was so much smaller than I remember it. The nurse anesthetist had me sit on the edge of the bed while she did her thing on my back. Trish was in front of me and I put my head on her shoulder while the spinal was being placed. I was still calm at this point. It didn't really hurt at all. Once she was finished she had me lay down on the bed. They put my legs in a frog leg position so they could insert the catheter and that is where I lost it. I hated the feeling of my legs being tingly yet I couldn't move them and or shake them to wake them up. I just said to Trish "I don't like this, I don't like this" over and over again. They put my legs straight after the catheter was in and I could feel that they were straight but my anxiety was already through the roof and it just wasn't a pleasant experience after that.
They started scrubbing my belly with what felt like a pumice stone. It felt so weird since I was starting to numb but wasn't all the way numb yet. Again another freak out moment. Trish stood by me and held my hand. She also started to help me regulate my breathing. So she said, "okay deep breath in...now breathe out..breathe in...breathe out" she said that over and over and it helped me calm down. It seemed like forever until Sam came in but at that point I was so focused on my breathing and Trish's voice to stay calm that it was probably a good thing that he didn't come in sooner. I heard him come in and then only about 4 min. after he was there Oliver was born.
After he was out and I heard him cry I felt better but I was ready to be done and out of that room. However I got a tubal so it took a little longer to finish up. I started to freak out again because I felt like I couldn't breathe. I felt like they were working so high up on my body. There was a curtain draped over my chest but if felt like they were working up around my boob area and pushing down so hard that I couldn't breathe. Sam stayed with Oliver and Trish stayed with me while I freaked out again and kept saying that I didn't like this and I wanted to sit up. Finally the nurse anesthetist asked me if I wanted something to calm me down. I said yes. Dr. Dillard overhead this conversation and asked the nurse who was cleaning up Oliver if she could please bring him to see me. I yelled that I didn't want to see him right then. Then I heard Dr. Dillard say that if I got something to calm me down then I might not remember seeing Oliver later. So I yelled that I didn't want to medicine after all. The nurse brought Oliver over to me and I immediately calmed down.
I am so appreciative to Dr. Dillard for giving me that information about taking the medicine would have made me out of it. The nurse took Oliver back to the nursery with Sam and I stayed in the OR to get sewn up. I kept asking how much longer it was going to take. Finally I was out of there and back in my recovery room. We told the nurses that we didn't want them to give Oliver a bath right away so he could come see me in recovery as soon as possible.
While in recovery I starting shaking soo bad. Trish explained that this is called the "after birth shakes" and is completely normal. I never had it with Collin & Gwen probably because I was so drugged up. She gave me another foot massage where she pushed some pressure points on my feet and it helped the shakes a lot. After about 30 min. Sam arrived in the recovery room with Oliver and I got to hold him in my arms for the very first time.
And nurse him
It was magical. The best part is I remember everything! I'm so appreciative to everyone for allowing me to have a wonderful birth experience. My wonderful doctor, my wonderful Doula, my amazing, outstanding husband and my wonderful family.
